Print Email RSS DIGG del.icio.us Stumble It!

How to Handle Hormone Hell

So many mothers-to-be have told me just how unprepared they were for the emotional side of pregnancy. The physical effects were obvious enough, but apparently not everyone knew that the crazy hormone cocktail the pregnant body is continually swilling can momentarily propel even the most relaxed, jovial mommy-to-be into states of belligerence, hopelessness, or fury over things as trivial as a television commercial or a missing tub of ice cream. Tack on common pregnancy concerns, such as what the future will be like, the state of your fetus’s health, strained familial relationships, or how your marriage, job, or friendships will change after you’re a mom and you’ve got every excuse to have full-blown freak-outs on a regular basis.

If you’re not feeling funky, don’t future trip that you will. Not everyone internally combusts. Some mommies are in a perpetual state of pregnant bliss, others find the experience to be about as fun as an IRS audit, and some cruise through the trimesters hitting the occasional PMS-like road bump with nary a bruise to show for it. But should you find yourself falling into a deep dark hole of sadness, anxiety, fear, or just plain pregnancy insanity, read the following measures that can help you find your emotional footing.

Accept that you are no longer in control and go with the flow. Recognizing that you are not in the driver’s seat and relaxing about it makes for a far easier ride. This general pregnancy truism was best exemplified for me during labor. I was in my hospital room with incredibly intense 60-second contractions that were three minutes apart. As the waves started to hit my first instinct was to jump out of my body and make a run for it. But since that wasn’t an option I went with my second choice, which was to brace myself, squeeze my eyes shut, clench every muscle in my body, and resist with every ounce of energy I could muster. However, I quickly discovered that the exact opposite tactic was the best way to get through them. When I felt a contraction coming on I got into the most comfortable position: bent over a tall table with my head resting on crossed arms and my legs spread like a police suspect being frisked. Then I focused on deep breathing and relaxing every muscle in my body, from my jaw to my shoulders to my legs to my toes. Doing a mental inventory and attempting to relax each muscle was a great diversion, made the pain easier to bear, and allowed me the mental capacity to become more fascinated by my body’s performance than anguished by it (though that didn’t stop me from later requesting an epidural). Similarly, fighting your newfound lunacy is infinitely more exhausting and traumatizing than simply embracing the things you cannot control.

Don’t hang out with people who piss you off. Pregnancy does a funny thing to relationships. It can bring you closer to friends who have children, clarify just how supportive people in your life are, and bring new depth to familial ties. But it can also alienate you from pals who are feeling envious of your new status or don’t want you to change, dredge up your childhood grievances against family members, and make usually pleasant enough people seem extremely annoying—especially if they yammer on with unsolicited and unwelcome maternal advice. In the latter instances my recommendation is to steer clear of irritating people as much as you can. You may not be able to dodge your patronizing boss or grumpy husband, but you can easily put some distance between yourself and that judgmental friend or know-it-all neighbor. Give yourself a little space from stressful relationships and you may even find a place in your heart to be gracious toward them later on.

Spend time with positive people. It’s just as important to surround yourself with people who are upbeat and support your status right now. Seek out sunshine people who can share your excitement with you.

Screen your calls. Letting the answering machine pick up is an intelligent way to stop yourself from getting worked up by anyone you’re not in the mood to talk to.
Incidentally, this preemptive measure becomes even easier after the baby arrives when you officially have a lifetime excuse to abruptly hang up without explanation (a huge boon when your mother is nagging you), not answer the phone at all, or take your sweet time to return calls. (Months are not unheard of among friends.) This, ladies, is one of the secret bonuses of motherhood—from here on out you are officially off the hook.

Edit your calendar. If you’ve become less Dr. Jekyll and more Mrs. Hyde, an overbooked schedule can make matters worse. Clear your calendar of unnecessary dates during especially emotional stints. That way rather than biting off a seldom-seen relative’s head at a business dinner, you can let your inner wild woman loose at home on someone who will still love you tomorrow.

Get some exercise. Breaking a sweat isn’t addictive for nothing. Getting into a workout groove encourages your brain to release endorphins, the body’s naturally occurring painkiller that is deployed whenever you are subjected to pain or stress. Try a brisk walk or take a swim. It is likely to put you into a happier headspace.

Votes: 5

5 4 3 2 1  

Related Articles

• The Real Story on Clomid from Dr. Fertility
• Woman Who Didn’t Know She Was Pregnant Gives Birth at Party
• Celebumoms’ Mother’s Day Gift of Choice: Mama Mio

Comments